RetroCrush #001

It’s kind of funny to watch movies from a decade or two past. What was then considered strikingly beautiful might look dated, or down right ugly by today’s standards. It’s strange how the perceived present view of what’s considered beautiful changes over time. Still there are those women whose beauty transcends the decades.

That’s what RetroCrush is all about, celebrating those women with timeless beauty who I have a bit of an obsession with. Some are well known, others not, some are still beautiful today in there older age, and some are dead. So without any further ado here’s my first pick for what I hope to be a regular feature.

Name: Pia Zadora
Real Name: Pia Alfreda Schipani
Date/Place of Birth: 5-4-1954, Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
Measurements: 34B-21-34 (Source: Celebrity Sleuth magazine).
Prime Years: 1980-1989

A Few Thoughts: The first time I saw Pia was on a VHS cover for Voyage of the Rock Aliens. I was just a kid, but I stared at the video cover in Block Busters every time I went in. I really didn’t believe a woman could be that beautiful. I thought that an artist had touched up the picture. When I finally got around to watching it I was awe.

Here was this short, very petite living doll, that’s the only way I could describe her. She looked like a doll or a live action version of an anime character. Totally unique in build and beauty, I was in love.

Over the years I tracked down some of Pia’s other movies. Most of all of them could be considered B-Movies. She was the first actress to win two Razzie awards two years back to back. Pia’s first film roll was that as a green alien in Santa Clause Conquers the Martians. So maybe she was destined for B-Movie fame from the beginning. 

As well as acting Pia has also had a singing career also reaching it’s peek in the 80’s. One other notable media appearance is a spread she did for Penthouse Magazine in 1983.

For those of you interested what I think is the best of Mrs.Zadora’s work is listed below.

Nevada Heat 

A.K.A. Fake-Out

Pure Pia Cheese! Pia sings, dances, and gets into all sorts of trouble. Definitely worth checking out to see Pia in her prime.

Voyage of the Rock Aliens

There aren’t a whole lot of movies that capture the feeling of the 80’s like this movie. Pia does some music numbers in this as well that are worth a laugh. Many people think Pia never looked better than in this film. I agree.

Butterfly

Incest themes and brief nudity make this the most racy Pia movie out there. No sing or dancing in this one but Pia does chew the scenery up as a little whore. Bath tub scene is worth the price of admission alone.

The Lonely Lady

This movie is notorious for being one of the lowest rated movies on IMDB, it’s in the bottom 100. A greatly ridiculous rag to riches story financed by her wealthy husband, The Lonely Lady is a must not only for Pia fans but for fans of cheese alike. The now infamous scene of Pia being assaulted with a garden hose by Ray Liotta is as timeless as Pia’s beauty!

Deal of the Week

I have a ritual I preform every Sunday after church. I look around on Craigslist for cars. Since moving to Mississippi I have have felt a bit of an underwhelming feeling every time I look at the Jackson listing. I keep forgetting  how big the DFW metroplex is compared to where I am now.

Anyone familiar with the DFW metroplex knows it's a lot more than just Dallas and Fort Worth. It also refers to the smaller urban areas in between the two city's and the larger towns surrounding the entire area. It's huge and the DFW Craigslist listing covers it all. So, I have gone back to searching the DFW listing. If I ever find something good I can always make the trip back down.

It doesn't happen often but every once in a while I come across something that is to good to be true, today is one of those days. One of my weekly searches is for vans. To grab a wider result I simplify my search terms like "dodge van", as opposed to "1976 Dodge B100". Querying that term (Dodge Van) I came up with an awesome result.

The listing said "Dodge Van For Sale - $900 (Dallas)". I always jump on these listings because the year is not listed because they are often older vans and they think it will scare away people from clicking. A lot of people don't know what they have when it comes to an older van.

This is obviously the case with this guy. The Dodge van for sale for $900 is a certifiable Mid 70's Good Times van. I called the guy and asked some questions. The paint is as old as the van and was purchased at a custom van dealer in '76. The body has very little rust and the only real problem seems to be the brakes.

If it weren't for the lack of storage space at my place I would buy this rig in a heartbeat

For those interested the sale can be found here.