There are guide books for virtually every task and occupation. Some might be surprised that there are actually quite a few on the "art" of seduction. Making steep promises like getting laid by the most beautiful women any night you choose, becoming an "Alpha Male", and even sending women subliminal messages and hypnotic techniques to get women to take off their clothes!!!
If you haven't already figured it out I was more than a little skeptical when I started looking at these guide books. So do these books really hold the secrets guys need to know to get more action, or is it a bunch of fluff? Read on for my thoughts.
This all started innocently enough, not to long ago I found myself single for the first time in 14 years. The last time I was actively dating the internet was still in it's infancy and there was no online dating scene. I've only lived at my current residents for about a year, and I find the locals not to be easiest people to hang out with.
So for the first time in my life I signed up for a free online dating site, I have had varying results but for the most part am happy. The thing is places like facebook and google are smart. Smart in the way that they track your surfing history and then display ads they think might appeal to you based on that data. Well since I had been visiting a large online dating site, I've been bombarded with ads to other date sites.
I usually ignore the ads on the right side of the screen on facebook, but one day I looked over and saw an ad I can't remember it verbatim but I think it went along these lines:
The Tao of Badass — Dating Tips for Men
www.thetaoofbadass.com/
Always Know What to Say, Effortlessly Engage With Confidence and Turn the Heads of Hotter Women!
I visited the site, I was pretty surprised to see that it was a pretty professorially done webpage. It had dating tips, advise, and hints on how to hit it off with the women. But everything posted eventually lead to a sales pitch to join the website or by the authors book. Well it's not cheap, and although I was curious I wasn't about to sign up for auto billing on my credit card.
It did give me the idea to look around and see if there were other "seduction" resources. Keep in mind that's exactly what this is. It isn't dating advise from a relationship coach or even advice on how to please a women in bed, it's more about getting the women in bed.
Amazon turned up a couple of dozen different results, I bought two used copies of books that were in the top 5, and found another website that had a free lite edition of their book. I'll start with the thickest volume of the bunch.
How to Become an Alpha Male: Attract Women and Become Successful at Seduction
By, John Alexander
Well this is by far the most expensive book I saw on the subject, it retails for $44.97. It's a thick paperback, and the price really doesn't reflect the production value. So it must be the content inside that's so valuable, right?
One would hope so. Reading the reviews posted on amazon it's pretty easy to get a picture of what's inside this book. In the reviews some people give testimonies of how effective the tools were they learned from reading this book. Some say it changed their life others said it was a waist of trees.
After reading the first few pages I started getting deja vu. The authors intro sounded a lot like the free information I read on The Tao of Badass website.
Both men claim to have been not that great with women through most of their youth, something happen that sent them on a quest for truth. They both claim to have done years of research including reading every other manual on the subject, and even going as far as studying psychology and the inter-working of the females mind! Pretty impressive huh?
After reading this cover to cover I had a pretty good idea as to what was being presented. In this book author John Alexander makes a case for the "Alpha Male" in today's society. He claims women are still primitive in the way that they have the desire to mate with the strongest of the male species or now the coolest guy at the bar.
This book claims to be different from all the rest by teaching you to be that "Alpha Male." Some advice it gives you is to not spend a dime on a potential one night stand unless the girl deserves it. There's no real formula but I guess it's okay to buy a girl a drink at the bar if the's already stuck her tongue down your throat. The book actually uses the term "reward." Which was quite bothersome to me, it was telling you to basically treat a woman like a prostitute but by all means don't let her in on the secret!
There are some practical things the book tries to teach the reader like approaches, reading body language, and gaining self confidence.
One theme throughout the book was hitting on any and everything that moves. Even if you don't find the girl attractive it will be another notch in the bed post and give you that much more confidence the next time your out.
Bang: More Lays In 60 Days
By, Roosh V
amazon link
Here's a self published number, that had a couple of good reviews so I gave it a shot.
After reading the title I thought that I would be swimming in the chicks, once I reached the back cover, not quite. Here's a quote from early on in the book:
"Before you dive in and read this book, I have to warn you that the journey is difficult and often disappointing. Is it worth it? Yes, without a doubt. The payoff for you will be better quality women and more power and confidence to get them. But it will not come without work on your part. You will need to interact with a very large number of women in different situations and environments. It’s not enough to just talk to the women you normally come into contact with at work or school―like a salesman you need to make cold calls to get leads, in the form of approaches. You will go to the bars and clubs and bookstores to meet women. You will talk to them everywhere, always practicing and experimenting. You will follow through with them, call them on the phone, spend money on dates, and try to bang them. You will maintain your stable like a sheep herder maintains his flock. You will put in your energy, your life-blood, into a game that may leave you mentally exhausted. You will deal with rejections, flakes, and temper tantrums that are negative and discouraging. You will spend time studying the game and taking notes, breaking down your encounters with women. And you will spend time creating material on your own. A large component in becoming successful with women is time. You will not turn into an player overnight. The best analogy I can make to describe the game is body building. Within a short amount of time training you will see quick gains and experience fast confidence boosts, followed by peaks and valleys where you lose or gain muscle mass depending on how motivated or healthy you are. There is no end to body building, but there is a time when you look at the mirror and say, "I’m happy with what I see.""
I don't know about you, but after reading that on page 6(!) I was kind of thinking the title to this book is a tad misleading. It doesn't really sound like you'll be getting more bedroom action in 60 days, by the authors own admission.
So what's in the book? Surprise, stuff about the Alpha Male, but that's not all! There are "Sure Fire" approaches that any woman would get hooked into a conversation with. As well as a "trick" to get a girls phone number, that every girl "falls" for!
The amazon reviews, were a bit conspicuous. Mostly positive and ended with disclaimers that they are no way affiliated with the author, hmmm.
How To Lay Girls Guide (Original Free Version)
This was 100% free, so I can't really complain about the atrocious spelling, grammar use, and lack of proper punctuation. But be warned, it's a tough read through.
This is actually a collection of little tidbits collected from usenet, forums, email list, and other "pro players." It adds up to a few dozen pages each containing a paragraph or two on the art of seduction.
Out of everything I read, believe it or not this actually contained some useful nuggets of knowledge. It's pretty much the same though, approaches, how to act in a crowd, rules on buying drinks for women, and so on.
For a third time I read how important it is to try and jump every girl you meet. Which brings us full circle where we began.
After thinking about everything I read, I have to say that 90% is probably bullshit. I believe when you are a single guy on the prowl for sex, when you approach a woman your chances are not 50/50 that you'll get laid. Even when deploying all the tactics given in these books, I still don't think it's 50/50.
Just because a women is at a bar full of single men doesn't necessarily means she going home with anyone, even the alpha male! Their are so many factors that come into play when two strangers hit it off and have casual sex. I don't really believe practicing these strategies put forth in these books will give you an upper hand or sway the odds more into your favor. Sorry to tell you this, but I think you either have it or you don't.
I believe virtually all sexual relationships start with attraction, I didn't read anything in any of these books telling you how to get fit, be humorous, how to dress, or have an attractive smile. Sure, things like self confidence, and a sense of worth help, but so does owning a Porche!
I believe the biggest problem with all three books is the fact that you're operating on advice from guys who may be good with the girls, or could be lying their ass off for face value and cash. What I didn't read in any of the texts was the female perspective. These authors act like the very women they're trying to pick up don't know what they really want and can be molded so easily like putty if you just follow the advice in these books.
It must be me but the women I know are not that stupid and can't be swayed by body langue, or being treated like dirt.
All the volumes I read basically said the same thing in a different way, and that is to approach every woman you see and make a pitch. Now if one truly follows this advice the odds will surely be better than someone pinning over just one girl. In fact if just about any guy who followed this advice would probably get "lucky."
That I'm sure would lead to more self confidence and a better self esteem both things women find attractive and could lead to more action. Bottom line it's the quantity over quality rule at play, and it doesn't take a manual to figure out the equation.
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